I always ask, but some people feel greedy or selfish if they tell you what they want. Plus, it’s nice to have someone else think about you and your needs and desires, and then put some effort into providing that for you.

Like if I said, “I want fancy jewelry,” that would feel petty and bratty. If my friend gave me a gift and said “I found this, and I thought it would fit your style and look great on you,” that is going to make me feel good about receiving it and about our relationship.

It’s always OK to ask, but it’s not OK to insist they tell you. Demanding an answer is like saying, “I don’t care enough about you to learn and remember your preferences.”

That said, there are things I won’t buy my wife because her preferences are too mysterious. I’ll pick two seemingly identical handbags, same dimensions, material, color combinations, etc, and she will determine that one is gorgeous and the other is shit. It’s a running joke with us that I’m hopelessly obtuse when it comes to style, and she’s far too capricious in matters of taste to predict what she will like. She loves handbags, and I support her getting whatever purses and bags she likes when she sees them.

Likewise, she doesn’t buy me techie stuff or tools.

That’s fair. We should call it regulation and labor laws. Minimum wage laws specifically enshrine tipping as a foundation of server wages, and closing that loophole is a necessary first step.

I think you just missed the beginning of the conversation and tried to jump into it.

We started by saying that these should have a flared end, and I said that without a flared end, it’s going to require medical intervention. That’s where you jumped in to say, rather condescendingly, that’s what the flared end is for. Go back and re-read the thread, because I really just think you’re missing the context of the conversation we’re having.

Regarding his disappointment, there are bigger and more complicated cubes. He can also be challenged to create patterns in the cube, like you mess up a cube and he has to match the randomness you created. That’s a fun way to keep practicing those cube skills without the monotony of solving the same puzzle over and over.

The first step to beating swamp ass is to acknowledge the problem.

… there’s a picture of them. The picture is the same regardless of our respective necks or woods.

Right, except they don’t.

That’s literally the rest of the comment. Did you just stop reading there?

First day on Earth? Welcome. Mind the dog shit, some people don’t pick up after themselves.

Yeah, all I see are embarrassing trips to the ER.

She was thinking “this is going to look awesome!” and she was right.

Wow, you’ve never worked a job before, huh?

You’ve never worked a tipped job, have you? Estimate the percentage of employers who pay minimum wage if tips are too low. Throw out any number.

Bullshit, and that’s a dangerously naive perspective. If everyone stopped tipping tomorrow, the only people that would be hurting are the people who serve.

All labor regulations exist because there will always be someone desperate enough to do anything for a paycheck. Child laborers. Prostututes. Dallas Cowboys. People will do anything for money, and the only way to prevent exploitation is with regulation. The “free market” will turn your bones into paste before it provides a living wage to laborers.

Capitalism is an unbalanced power dynamic that relies on an excess of desperation. If people didn’t need to sell their time, they’d never sell it for less than it is worth to employers. So if everyone agreed to just stop tipping, service would get much worse, and servers would be working for $2.10 an hour plus kitchen scraps.

At least we agree on uour last point.

When the fuck did “nasty” become a political insult?

I would be holding onto the pole, especially if it meant I could cast firebolt and not have it catch fire.

I don’t know where you live, but start local. And in the meantime, stop going to restaurants.

Republicans telling on themselves again.

It is a bit insane, because the world is a bit insane right now, and frankly I think it’s your fault.

Well, not you specifically, and it’s not entirely your fault. But part of the reason tyranny and fascism have gripped power across the globe is that political discussion is considered impolite. It’s offensive to point out how absurd or dangerous a political policy is, so we just avoid the subject. Wouldn’t want to offend a conservative bigot by pointing out other people exist.

And because polite people avoid the subject, only extremists engage in the debate. Nuance is lost, and the crazies take charge of the nuthouse whilst “normal” people, like yourself, fret about people talking about the problem.

It would be fucking fantastic to look at a picture of the sky and not think of how air pollution is being deregulated, how Qatar is buying influence with the President by gifting him an airplane, how space is being monetized by a South African Nazi, or how we’re all likely to die of an airborne virus because the person in charge of coordinating our healthcare response has a brain that’s mostly worm poo.

It would be wonderful to stop talking about politics, but not talking about it has led us, inexorably, to this point. We have a duty to discuss ideas when they affect all of us. We have a responsibility to point out stupidity and ignorance and make conservatives feel ashamed of it. It’s not fun for us, either, but if we were to follow your lead, we will end up murdering children in death camps. Which is exactly where we are.

It really is tough to talk about anything else, and even when you do talk about it, it’s more of an exasperated sigh than a conversation.