• Crikeste@lemm.ee
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    2 days ago

    This was very frustrating for me when I went through it. I was in a growing phase, trying to get my life on tracks, and I HATED that I could never have all my clothes I love to wear washed while still being able to wear them. Obvious, I know. But it really wasn’t something I had encountered before, because I never really cared about keeping things tidy.

    It’s funny that once you decide you want things tidy, you realize they never truly will be.

    You can clean up all the cans, but you will crack another.

    You can do all the laundry, you gotta wear it

    You can clean the plates, still gotta eat off of them

    • trolololol@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Just chill, there’s an insurmountable amount of work to have a perfect house. Is that what truly gives you happiness, or is it the untidiness that gives you unease?

      And either case, is that truly coming from you or the family/peer pressure?

      • Crikeste@lemm.ee
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        23 hours ago

        It’s neither, honestly. Great question, really.

        I’ll be honest: I’m an alcoholic finally doing the work to never touch that shit again. So in that, I’ve been doing a lot of “finding myself”. I’ve been trying to be a bit more conscious of things and to also do a lot less sitting around playing video games and watching YouTube and Twitch. And I’ve found that being in a nice space is really comforting, so I started working on my tidiness. And that’s where I found those things I mentioned.

        I wouldn’t say it’s coming from my family, it might not even be coming from me. It feels like a “societal” thing. I hate to use this example, but like Jordan Petersen saying “make your bed”.

        I don’t know, I’ve also found myself feeling “worthless” in the dating and sex scene, so it’s also probably coming from there. I think “what girl would want to hangout in a shitty room?”

        I got a lot to process lmfao

        • trolololol@lemmy.world
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          21 hours ago

          That is wholesome to hear. And I get you, society has some norms that are actually healthy when you mention it like that: shower frequently and don’t let the house turn into a stinking cave 😃

          Good on ya, and remember to be grateful to yourself for the results and actually take a minute to enjoy the outcomes.

      • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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        1 day ago

        Great comment, but IMO telling someone to “just chill” almost never has the desired effect.

        That is the goal though, so I’m not saying you’re wrong.

    • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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      2 days ago

      I feel this comment intensely. I have no idea where this dissatisfaction comes from, but it was just an invisible part of the lived environment for most of my life, and only now am I realising that we’re chasing something, an end state, that is fundamentally unachievable.

      Maybe it’s the video games. I’m waiting for an achievement to pop up so I know I’m finished lol. :P

      • trolololol@lemmy.world
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        20 hours ago

        Yep

        I’m in a less is more phase. Consciously not pursuing certain things if it means I can get it with extra effort, and putting that effort into appreciating what I already achieved.