Oh no. Anyways…

HIMS, HERS, and dating apps for days.

• A belgian waffle machine that is caked in burnt dough

• The bacon is flimsy and under cooked

• Plain bagels stiff from being left out too long and a load of white break next to a toaster you have to cycle 3 times

• The kids leave a plate full of waffles floating in a pool of syrup, 4 bites taken

• Half the 4 seater tables are taken up by 1 person, with plenty of 2-seaters wide open

• Regular and decaf coffee that tastes burnt, and only powdered creamer, offers tea but it’s so picked over it’s 2-3 types of fruity chai or chamomile, green tea.

A local, small time hockey team has middle-arena ticket for $13. The price almost doubles because they use tm. $10 in cOnVeNiEnCe fees and processing and the “privilege” of using their shitty app.

Them: Keep the government out of my personal life

Also them: [screams about banning everything they’re told they shouldn’t like]

Only 22? Should that include someone for Graphic Design?

You have Palps dead-to-rights with the tip of your lightsaber mere inches from his face. What do you do?

• Extend your arm forward and saber him in the face effectively ending the reign of the Dark Lord of the Sith and saving the galaxy from impending darkness

• Monologue, then swing lightsaber back, reset stance excpecting some kind of epic killing blow

So iPhone users can act like dicks because they are the in crowd when messaging each other.

They can interact with their messages in more ways than others. Direct message reactions (like, heart) and they can see the dot-dot-dot when another iPhoner was typing. I actually had a girl give me a hard time over this because she was iPhone and I’m android.

I have an eclectic taste in music

Every custom playlist is top-40 hits