I saw an angel take a shit, then eat said shit.
God works in mysterious ways.
This reminds me of the story about some old dude’s dog that always shits on my neighbor’s sidewalk. One day neighbor saw that and run to that guy with scary look on his face. He started scolding old guy that he should clean after his dog and old guy respond he’s too old to do that, his back hurt and stuff. The dog saw the whole thing and in a shame he just ate his own shit so poor old man didn’t have to clean it up.
Kudos to the dog.
If you’re unable to care for a pet, you need to find it a new home.
my angel went one level derper.
he took a shit, ate it, puked up that eaten shit, then started eating that shitty puke… which he puked.
had to throw out that sofa.
One of mine brought in a frozen turd one winter and started chewing on it.
Angel poop probably taste pretty good tbf
You’re free to try it
Angels attacked a friend of mine for more than 90 minutes, taking off and eating part of her legs, arms, breast and face. The paramedics that eventually brought her to the hospital were so traumatized they still have not returned to work. My friend has had 11 reconstructive surgeries so far.
#touchedbyanangel
God gives his sweetest humans to his hungriest angels.
He works in such mysterious ways. But I Trust in his greater (meal) plan
What do you expect of a homicidal god with double standards?
Demons were angels once…
Not all of them. And depends on the religion and sect therein
Did that happen to be a pit bull angel?
These were 4 german shepherd angels
Ah yes, dogs made to hunt and maim humans hurt your friend, so all dogs are bad as a consequence.
I’m truly sorry for what happened to your friend, but people are 100% responsible for their pets. Be not angry at the dogs, but the person that owned them.
Have no fear, my child
B E N O T A F R A I D
Imagine a pitbull goring a toddler before looking you dead in the eyes and saying “BE NOT AFRAID”
I saw an angel casually walk down a street with a human head in his mouth. I’d post the video but, y’know, rule 4.
Where the fuck did you have to see that?
Mexican news. It happened in Zacatecas last year.
If it was a turtle with a head on its back, I could stomach it. But a dog?!
The dog stole the head from a crime scene
What are you guys on about? Lucifer was an angel.
A hot, sexy angel, as the TV keeps telling me.
But let’s be honest, God has killed way more people than Satan. Dude brags about it too, with his rainbows meaning
“Haha, I promise not to hit you anymore… but I could.”
I can’t even think of anyone Satan killed; but God’s killed the whole world at least once and only promised not to do it again in the same way.
Satan has a few bodies to his name. Though best estimates are several times lower than people might think.
https://whyevolutionistrue.com/2011/04/27/murders-god-vs-satan/#
Which is funny because how would you even defy an omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent being?
Though the old testament did write them more as old friends that disagreed on some things rather than bitter enemies, having bets and fucking with humans for their amusement. Kinda like the whole thing was made up by a bunch of different people at different times who didn’t all have a strong grasp on what real power was and thought it required anger like a human with power that only exists because of threats of violence and were really just trying to turn their wise reputation into their own power backed by a vengeful god’s power.
Which is funny because how would you even defy an omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent being?
From what I remember when my parents took me to church as a kid, he just kept bugging God for power. Eventually God had enough of his shit.
God with a thick rock hard dick under them robes, just throbbing at the thought of sending dogs to eat babies
👶🐕 ✝️🍆💦
According to the lore, demons are fallen angels so you can keep this narrative going
pit bullsangels when they see a childBE NOT AFRAID
OR DO BE AFRAID
IT IMPROVES THE FLAVOR
Angels in the Bible: “Be not afraid”
Angels in Ultrakill: “I WILL WRITE A BIBLE STORY IN YOUR BLOOD, MACHINE!”
Angels in Evangelion: 🔹
Perfection!
The latter can fortunately be defeated with the strongest weapon known to man (and machine):
Pocket change
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
My angels are really fucking stupid. And one of them killed and ate (half of) a mole yesterday.
That mole was coming right for you! That angel saved your life!
An angel pooped on my yard
This tracks. The God of the Bible sent an angel to kill the first born child of every household in Egypt unless they splattered lamb’s blood over their door. (Hence the Passover)
Why God have bonar
Hey, angels get hungry for that succulent childflesh just like anyone else.
