Reminds me of a joke my grandfather used to tell. A guy bought a new suit from a tailor at a significant discount, and took it home to show his wife. He put it on, and his wife was not happy. “It is a nice suit, but look how it bunches up around the waist! And look at the way the collar pokes out. Also this sleeve is shorter than the other.”

The guy went back to the tailor, and the the tailor said “Oh, yeah, all you need to do is tug on the crotch a little, and it smooths the waist. For the collar, just tuck it here under your chin. And for the sleeve, just scrunch up your shoulder and they will look even.”

So he wears the suit home, scrunching his shoulder, tucking his chin, and tugging on the crotch. At the bus stop, two old ladies see him, and one says to the other “Oh, look at that poor man,” and the other replies, “Yeah, but what a nice suit!”

The joke works better when told in person.

Not NSFW links. You get a popup window that says “To view mature content, open in the app” or something. I don’t feel like clicking it again to read it verbatim. You can replace www. with old. but ain’t nobody got time for all that.