“You kids look like you could use a delicious fruity beverage!”
If he’s the one fixing all the destruction wrought by Kool-Aid Man, isn’t he the good twin? Which would of course make Kool-Aid Man… the evil twin!
He’s actually trapping people in, that’s why the Kool-Aid man has to burst through so many walls, he’s rescuing those people.
Okay, I like this lore.
Don’t fall for it, brother. It’s all Kool-Aid propaganda.
People in the know understand why we tell crazy people they’ve been on the Kool-Aid.
Their profiteering off of people’s thirst. Have you ever asked yourself why people get thirsty in the first place? It’s big-Kraft making you thirsty.
People in the know understand why we tell crazy people they’ve been on the Kool-Aid.
Because you’re unaware that Jim Jones was a cheapskate and bought knock-off “Flavor Aid” instead?
A Cask of
AmontilladoKool-Aid
But the goatee!
Valid argument
I’ve scrolled past this twice now and each time I swear I’m seeing “Warm Hitler”
If you’re cold they’re cold.
Pretty sure he was already warm because invading Poland was so not cool.
Sounds better than the good one, maybe I’m destined for evil
If he hinders warming, isn’t that in the same vein as aiding cooling?
I watch too much MST3K. I couldn’t understand why having a warm backside was the opposite of Kool-Aid.
He uses warming to hinder cooling.
Then it should be “the warmer” instead of “warm hinder”.
Je goes “oh no” every time his douchebag twin breaks down a wall because he knows he’s the one that’s gonna have to fix it. If he doesn’t he risks getting blamed for the destruction and the bills because they’re twins and it’s happened too many times before.
“Oh FFS Kool-Aid Man”
I got the idea to turn this into a creepy pasta.
I stared at the river with its clear clean water and my sandpaper tongue swept across my chapped lips. I was thirsty but I couldn’t give in. Not yet.
We still had a full day of travel before we got behind the gun towers of the next city. Their high walls and fields of land mines were the only real protection from the Warminder. We couldn’t risk refreshing ourselves out in the open like this. But the temptation was there.
I longed to jump into the water and drink my fill. The hydration gel packs we were alotted to keep us functioning between safe zones just didn’t cut it. Maybe I could just get a mouthful. A mouthful wouldn’t hurt would it?
Before I could move there was movement to my left. Someone had lost control before I had a chance to. And now he was running straight into the water and plunging his head below the surface and taking in deep gulps of water.
The rest of us hesitated and exchanged glances. The only sound was the splashing and slurping of water. A heartbeat later and 2 more ran for the water. They ran and fell face first and began drinking.
A feeling if anxiety shot through me. Was it safe? Could the Warminder see us? Was the water as refreshing as it looked?
I dropped my pack and stumbled towards the water falling on my knees at the edge of it. I cupped my hands and sunk them beneath the surface and began to raise pure beautiful water to my lips. My lips ached, my tongue beckoned, my heart raced, but that’s when I heard it.
Oh No!
I tried to shout but my throat was too dry. I sprawled away from the water. There were arms and hands grabbing me, pulling me back to safety, away from the water. Then everything happened all at once.
The Warminder was there. A wall of jagged red bricks that jutted out in at terrible angles had already encompassed the first man. I saw the terror in his eyes before the last brick slid in sealing his fate. Another had been close but got sandwiched between bricks as walls were built lightning quick. Fingers and arms stuck out from the walls showing last ditch efforts to cling to life and escape the wrath of the Warminder. All that was left was the sounds of muffled screams.
7 people were lost to the thirst that day. I was almost one of them. And I will never forget the evil grin of that terrible creature, the Warminder.
this is glorious!
I’d read a much longer story about it, what implications would this have on the rest of society?
evil koolaid man looks like a jugalo
He’s a pitcher full of Faygo.
I feel like it should be “Warm-Hindrance Man”
Warmhinder does sound like an actual name though
